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tv   The Daily Show With Jon Stewart  Comedy Central  April 23, 2014 7:30pm-8:01pm PDT

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stewart. captioning sponsored by comedy central [ cheering ] >> welcome to the daily show. i'm jon stewart. nice. tonight we got our selves a humdinger on the program. a senator from massachusetts, elizabeth warren, is going to be joining us. it is but we begin tonight right away. s with breaking news from chelsea clinton's uterus. >> mark and i very excited that we have our first child arriving later this year. >> they've got a child arriving, how did they pull that off? really, that's how it happened? i mean, if that's how it happens, i should have six kids! oh really, not every time? oh, okay.i should have six kids!
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[ laughter ] >> here's the odd thing about the announcement: darryl issa has already subpoenaed it to testify about benghazi. tell us what you know, baby. [ laughter ] >> but congratulations to the clinton family. news media? that's the 2016 presidential are speculatron baby. >> does that factor in? >> could it put a bump in hillary's 2016 plan? and is itselfist to ask? >> no silly billy, it's not sexist. even though it is a question that has never ever been posed to a male candidate ever.
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for god sakes, mitt rom any has like a litter of grandchildren. mitt rom any has for god sakes, if i'm not mistake, mitt romney has like a grandchild petting zoo! [ laughter ] >> the guy added three grandchildren while he was campaigning! he is the only candidate in history whose electoral college total is less than the chairs he has to put out at thanksgiving. my point is he got crushed in the election by someone who has no grandchildren. the grandchildren factor never came up in the race between obama and romney. when taft ran he was actually
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pregnant. senator dianne feinstein, senator from the great state of bligorp 7, is are brutal and widespread than had been reported that be the cia had reported. or to put that another way. >> former cia director michael hayden questioned dianne feinstein's reason for releasing the report as emotional. >> emotional feeling on the part of the senator but i don't think it leads you to an objective report.
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>> senator just needs her beauty sleep. that's all. [ laughter ] >> so the way the former head of the cia is defending that agency's use of torture is to argue that the information in the senator's report was unreliable because it was imparted under emotional distress. well -- i'd say that guy is going to be sad tomorrow to see that zinger in his in box. it is a scene we see again and again. you know? when allies have chris christie released a report exonerating christie in the bridgegate scandal,. >> she was emotionally concerned about how she was perceived by the governor.
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one of the christie officials she was with, the report released thursday doubles down as pour trying ms. kelly as weeping and relying on men for stability. >> no? but the report concluded that kelly, quote, could look much prettier if she smiled. hated to see her resign but loved to watch her go. over and over again there seems to be a concern for emotionality, there was concern when hillary clinton lot her guard down. >> as close to a breakdown as i've ever seen hillary have. she is letting her emotions out. can't help it, bewill diserred, frustrated. >> we can't help it to have
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people breaking down and crying. >> of course we can't handle that. hillary clinton isn't fit to serve with our stronger more stable male politician he. you know how the ladies are with the -- (laughing). >> when i think of what kyle has mend to me over the past 15 years. >> god almighty! >> making sure that these kids have a shot at the american dream. you it's important. [ laughter ] >> stop it, stop it, that man is not crying. he's a male. he's not crying. he's wearing his favorite onion shirt. that's an onion shirt.
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it's not just the men crying, it's the mood swings. >> hillary seems to have a whole lot of anger. >> why is she so darn angry? >> what is (bleep) wrong with her? calm it dowj lady? you got to learn how to control your temper. >> if you conduct yourself that way in the courtroom your rear end is going to get thrown in jail. >> damn i'm governor, can you just shut up for a second? >> thank you, exactly. that's how you handle government business. calm, cool, collected. but the ladies, one minute, yah yah yah yah and then the next minute they're giving the silent treatment. >> mr. chairman, i have a procedural question.
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mr. chairman, i have a procedure question. mr. chairman, you cannot run a committee like this. >> republican cufertion in this action -- >> we're adjourned. close it down. thank you. >> don't thank us, thank you for showing us all how conflict resolution is handled by males. not like females. >> i call it garbage. >> dr. you just be quiet. you be quiet. >> you don't oa own me. i pay your salary. >> okay, what i'm talking about! [applause] f >> the best part of the bit is the woman sitting behind representative young who sits up and stunned disbelieving
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admiration. that is just pure admiration. at the high level of male ds discourse in the people's house. i'm surprised she was able to keep quiet. as excitable as the ladies get sometimes. are (laughing). >> you know the ladies with the screaming. at least that lady had the time to put herself together, put her face on because you know how vain the ladies can be, how the ladies are worried about what they look like. jon in your zeal to make a case that the women are too emotional to hold public offers, you almost made an opposite case. showcasing, highlighting, respected males appear to be not in total control of their emotional, let's call it
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selves -- my friend i see the critical mistake you have made in your thinking. for all those examples of male emotion are in fact not negative but positive. >> a takes a lot more courage fr a politician to cry on television. than be tough. >> congressman we love it when you get fibery like that. >> straight shooter he's tough he'll take on hecklers. >> you see an honest open governor who does show emotion. >> he was forceful aggressive. >> he was forceful aggressive, that's a man's man. who gets choked up about the things he feels passionate about, for america and the hopes for his fellow americans is something evil? >> that's the lesson we have learned today. in politics it's okay to be a learned today. in politics it's okay to be a pussy as long as you get
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[cheering and applause] >> welcomwelcome back. her new book a fighting chance, please welcome back to the program senator elizabeth warren. senator.
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[cheering and applause] >> nice to have you here. book is called "a fighting chance." boston is in fact strong. before we get started obviously you're a lady senator so i'm just going to put this out here. [ laughter ] >> all right. there's that anger we've heard about. do you feel that in washington? do you feel that women are treated differently, either by the media or by your colleagues because the sense we get from watching this show for instance chelsea clinton's grandchild being a factor in hillary clinton's career, does that exist? >> yes.
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>> we seem to have the tapes that prove it exist. >> uh-huh. >> do you actively battle it or ignore it? >> that's what you're trying to do, get to the things that really matter. get to the issues that matter to you, to make sure that your voice gets heard on behalf of the people who sent you to washington to work for them. so yeah, it's a fight but it's the right fight and you just got to have it. >> when you came here the first time you were a professor, you were an activist. the second timed you came here you were a candidate for senator, the third time you were a senator. in those iterations who has the nicest bathrooms, harvard or the senate? >> this is a cool thing about the senate. there haven't been many women senators. so for this year the first time we now have 20 women in the united states senate!
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[cheering and applause] >> nice. >> although i would like to say we can hold that applause for when we can say, we have at least 50 women in the united states senate. [cheering and applause] >> but there was just one little tine 80 women's bathroom. so you had to kind of -- one tiny women's bathroom. >> are you serious? >> you had to scooch in there. i never saw the men's room but they seemed to be coming in and out okay. so developmentally they had to make a change. the united states senate is changing. we now have a bigger ladies room. >> congratulations! [applause] >> i can just imagine that coming to the floor and the republicans filibustering until they had to use it. [ laughter ] >> that's right.
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>> what where you have found the difference, being in the senate versus fighting from theouts, what does it feel like to fight from within an institution that toful observers is corrupted by money, ideology and the other types of dogma, have you found that a frustration? >> the problem we've had for a long time now is washington works for those who can hire armies of lobbyists and lawyers. if you are a huge corporation if you are a billionaire, boy your voice gets heard in that place. and what you want gets attended to. for ordinary families it just doesn't work so well. so it's really the same kind of fight. i feel like i've been involved in exactly the same kind of fight from the very beginning. i give you an example of where we are. kids who can't afford to go to
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college, their parents can't afford to write them a check so they have to borrow money. the united states government says we will lend you the money to go to school. that's a good thing to do. and then piles onto the interest rates so the government makes tens of billions of dollars in profit off the backs of kids getting an education. i think it's obscene for the government to make profits. [applause] >> if that doesn't incite me, that isn't even a corporate interest, that is a government internal corruption is it not. >> that's exactly the point. what i want to do i think we're going to do next month, refinance, cut the interest rate on those student loans. in order to do that we have to
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find something else in the budget to find that money. we ought to close those loopholes, make their billion airs pay as much in taxes as their secretaries do. >> i get that. so the fed, the fed has an open window, a discount window where these banks can come in and borrow at zero percent interest, they can grab millions and millions of dollars and turn it around and turn it into treasuries or whatever it is and make 3 or 4% and turn it around and so you're telling me kids that don't have enough money to go to college have to pay interest on loans but these congressmen can come in and make the money printing machine -- >> that's how the game works. >> more with senator ♪ we got a random red couch, don't ask me why. ♪ ♪ people eatin' favorites with a girl or a guy. ♪
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we'll pay your early termination fees. so you can get the new galaxy s5 for $0 down. >> all right, so we're back, we're talking with senator elizabeth warren. here is where i think it gets interesting. so the ideal is fairness. ideologically, principles but constituents, can't be ignored. let's say it's the medical device tax for obamacare. they have this in place, it's a 2 to 3% tax on medical devices to help pay for obamacare.
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you are from massachusetts. >> i am. >> they are the second largest seller of these medical devices. >> uh-huh. >> so you voted against taking that tax out. that scenessan seems antithetict it should be. >> i don't think taxing manufacturing of any kind because we need to produce more manufacturing jobs in this country. if we've got to take it out we've got to find another place for it, that's how it works to keep the budget going. you've hit on a key part about how washington works now, when washington actually works and when it doesn't. i want to go back to the point if we can for just a second about college. we can do it around any part of this. when i grew up my mom worked a minimum wage job at sears.
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my dad sold carpets ended up as a maintenance man. >> right. >> i made it to the united states senate and a big part of the reason for that is that i went to a commuter college that cost $50 a semester. and i went to a college that cost $50 a semester and got a good education because i grew up in an america that said our job is to invest in our kids. and to help them build a future. and that's what's fundamentally changed. it's tough out there, it really is a rigged game. and it's set up now over and over and over again. >> and it's probably always been. >> well, not like this. >> right. >> it's set up over and over and over that the rich get richer and the powerful more powerful. money and concentrated power. all we got on the other side is we've got our voices around we get our votes. if we get out there around make
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something out of them. [applause] >> i tell you, good on you for believing on the fight and dealing with obviously all the different complication that occur with it. a fighting chance -- did you do the audio book? >> i did it all. it's me. >> you did that? >> i did it all. >> wouldn't it have been good to have willford brimley? >> yes. >> i'll listen to it in my car that i keep inside my private plane. welcome to the framily, dad! i've been hearing good things about sprint's new network. oh, it's unbelievable. fewer dropped calls, better call quality... it's fast, right? sprint a un tout nouveau réseau lte avec un spectre tri-bande. you can also text. yes. you can also text.
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>> hey that's our show, here is the moment again. >> damn man i'm governor can you just shut up for captioning sponsored by comedy central captioned by media access group at wgbh - roommate meeting. roommate meeting! - gogo, what the hell? i've got a hangover! - i don't give a [bleep] about your hangover, okay, brendan? i want a roommate meeting, and i want it now!
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okay. now, somebody's been taking [bleep] out of the refrigerator and throwing it on the ground, and it's pissing me off. is this another one of your stupid pranks, jonald? - no. and your pranks are stupid. - is it you, monday? - what? [eerie music] - i said, somebody's been taking [bleep] out of the fridge and throwing it on the [bleep] ground. and i want to know who it is, because it's not funny! - well, what i want to know is, who keeps pulling the sheets off my bed and hanging them from the ceiling fan at night? - was that you, monday? - what? - have you been taking everybody's sheets off them in the night and hanging them from the ceiling fans? - what? no. - well, clearly, someone's been doing that! [glass shatters] - whoa! who did that? - yeah! who the [bleep] just did that? - which one of you just threw that bottle? - what are we even talking about right now? - did you [bleep]ing throw that bottle, jonald? - no, gogo! [bleep] you! i didn't throw it! - well, did you [bleep]ing throw that bottle, brendon?


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